adoption qualifications

Why our social worker should not have approved us for adoption

If you had asked me a decade ago what would make an ideal adoptive family, I would’ve responded something about a family who had open hearts and was willing. I thought love was all you needed. Five years ago, I would’ve told you that you also needed to understand trauma, want Dr. Purvis to live […]

Transracial Adoption and Charlottesville

Of the 14 people that have lived in our house over the last decade, only 3 are White. The rest are Black or Asian or some combination. I’ve experienced forms of racism and discrimination for as long as I can remember, and I’m Asian living near a fairly diverse metropolitan area. I know that the […]


I’m currently in a mental battle that has been going on for the better part of a year. “How unconditional should love really be?” Or maybe the better question, “Does unconditional love equal unconditional relationship on the other person’s terms?” I’m hoping not. What if that person is a child of yours? Still hoping not. […]

A note to my pre-adoptive mom self

Dear rosy-eyed pre-adoptive mom self, First, let me start off by saying that your heart is big and your intentions are as noble as you know how to make them at this point of your life. I appreciate your no-fear, go-big-or-go-home attitude. I also know you are as stubborn as they come, so there is […]